Liverpool’s Crapital of Culture opening ceremony
Last night I went to the opening ceremony for Liverpool’s (in)famous year as European Capital of Culture. While I stood there feeling cultured, enlightened, and generally pretty smug about myself I thought, “this is something worth dashing off a quick blog post about”. So quick-and-dirty, rough-and-ready, and with no more rubbish puns, here it goes.
In all honesty, this post’s titular pun is a bit unfair. I love Liverpool – I’ve lived here for almost three years now, and it’s a great city. I do think the “Capital of Culture 2008″ title is genuinely merited, with the myriad of opportunities for arts-and-entertainment-related-treats the city offers, not to mention to benefit that the resulting investment (arguably) has been and will continue to be. The main problem people seem to have with the Capital of Culture is the way it’s being implemented by the various bodies responsible. It’s easy to be cynical though, so I attended this evening’s ceremony with an open mind. Unfortunately however, it deserved any appalling derogatory wordplay I could throw at it.
My overall impression was that the ceremony seemed like a bloody-big-budget school play. It opened with a load of acrobats hanging off a huge crane, dressed in hard hats and hi-vis jackets, which one can only presume was meant as a tongue-in-cheek reference to the fact that the city’s looked a bit like a building site for the past couple of years. As the night’s compére said, “tonight, the Big Dig becomes the big gig!”. But had it actually been a big gig, it would have been far better: a couple of bands, a bit of dance, a comedian and a extract from a play – ace. As it was however, there were 35 minutes of an epic, overblown intro full of fireworks, cringe-worthy poetry and, inexplicably, loads of kids carrying boxes onstage. 200 guitarists riffed along to an unrecognisable noise while stood on top of the roofs of the Empire Theatre, Lime Street Station, the Radio City tower and, erm, a car park. Probably sounded like a great idea when sat around a table in a board room, but on the night it reached Spinal Tap-esque levels of pompous unintended hilarity. And while the BBC are right in saying that Echo and The Bunnymen, The Farm, Toxteth rapper Riuven, Pete Wylie (of The Mighty Wah!), as well as Vasily Petrenko and the Royal Liverpool Philharmonic Orchestra “took centre stage“, that’s literally all they did. All that talent, and they didn’t perform, oh no. They were paraded on stage and stood there waving like muppets. What a waste.
Following all that overlong “intro” nonsense, the only two vaguely-worthwhile parts of the event were single-song performances from Ringo Starr and Liverpool band The Wombats. But even then, both were mimed (seemingly at the insistence of the organisers rather than the artists – The Wombats are a great live band normally, tonight making a point of knocking over their gear well before the end of the song). And who really cares about a self-congratulatory song from The Beatles’ drummer’s new solo album – accompanied by that famed Scouser, Dave Stewart of the Eurythmics. Who’s actually from Sunderland. And I do like The Wombats, so it would be churlish to point out that they’re not exactly the most established contemporary Merseyside band, with one hit to their name. The Coral/Zutons anyone?
Well, I’ve gone on long enough now; “I didn’t have time to write a short letter, so I wrote a long one instead” in the words of Mark Twain. How’s that for culture?
I guess, they meant it to be a joke…
well, it didnt work that way either tho…
Seiji Nakano
January 12, 2008 at 3:09 pm
What they don’t mention is that they are actually sharing this year’s ‘Capital of Culture’ title with two other towns – Stavanger and Sandnes in Norway. Having three ‘Capitals of Culture’ seems to suggest that someone at the EU forgot what the word ‘Capital’ means
David Russell
January 12, 2008 at 7:07 pm
I was there !!! Oh God…It was, or must have been a joke… an unintended one ! The Liverpool Culture Company have had effectively 4 years and a considerable budget
(suggestions are about £180m) to present the city to the world, in a new light.
What an opportunity wasted!
It started with what appeared to be a local bouncer (community spirited & artistic i’m sure ) in a hard hat and headlamp ( i didn’t know Liverpool had a mining community!), along with a flourescent safety jacket. This may be because he ( who was he by the way?) was a building supervisor checking all the scaffolding, in The European City of Culture 2008, was secure!
Having appeared somewhat nervous, he loosened up, undid a few buttons to expose his tuxedo, looked down to the creased piece of paper in front of him, screaming to the crowd and presumably millions watching around the world (CBS America where there) ‘ …here he is singing a track from his new album, in the shops from Monday, RIIIINGO STAAAAAR.
This guys unsuitability found new heights there and then, when he did the record company and RIIIINGO a favour, contradicting all that is wholesome about culture, it being free from corporate interference.
Although, it was done with the sort of panache of a bingo caller at The Mecca on Park Road.
Ringo was ok but wasn’t he a drummer, well he was 40 years ago. He did drum the beat from The End, but unbelievably missed the beat only to pick it up again like a true pro. Then whipping the V ’s at the camera (peace man!). In fairness his presence was enough, he did his bit.
The artistic talent this city has produced, its pedigree & history is on a par with any city across the world, yet this golden opportunity was given to a bunch of 3 rd rate public sector employees, councillours and quangos. Scandalous!!
Why wasn’t David Morrissey the Master of Ceremonies, he has a strong, great Liverpool accent, real presence in his voice. Ken Dodd, Ricky Tomlinson, and where was he Sir Paul Mc Cartney. Last night was the night to pull all the stops out. To put all the wrongs right.
This has been one of the very few opportunities the city has had to disspell the stereotypes and present to the world that the problems of the 1970’s and 1980’s are behind them. But all that ceremony did was exacerbate them!!
Looking on the bright side the Wombles,sorry the Wombats, defied the odds and frostbite,by giving a forceful and energetic performance. Presumably, the drummer, who was in fancy dress for the occasion, did so to avoid being associated with this expensive school production, not very rock n roll.
Believe it or not i am from the area and would & will back Liverpool to the hilt but that was not good enough infact not even close, it was very, very, very amateurish.
Regardless of origin, by the way which Liverpool school did Dave Stewart go to? the ceremony should have been halted, sorry drawn to an end by Yazoo, that 80’s icon, shivering her way to ‘The only way is up, baby!’ it surely is…. Good luck Liverpool !!
neil
January 13, 2008 at 12:46 am
Well i went last night and i thought that it was brilliant!
Anonymous
January 13, 2008 at 11:53 pm
Well spoken Jonthan!
I liked the stage design with the building site thing – a bit of self irony is always good. But the rest? What a waste of time and money.
But look on the bright side – Liverpool 08 can only get better.
BTW – in a recent poll made in stavanger 1/3 of the people claimed that they couldn’t care less about it being capital of culture.
Sunnuva
January 15, 2008 at 12:00 pm
Apart from “Anonymous”, looks like views are pretty unanimous! The Stavanger points are interesting too.
And thanks Neil for the detailed thoughts.
Jonathan Deamer
January 27, 2008 at 12:12 pm